Read the title again. It does say "hoarder" not "hoar" or some other weird, misspelled version of "whore". I'm not here to tell you about what a fantastic slut I am (which, incidentally, I am not). This is about WORK and lecture notes and other serious sh*t.
OK no, maybe not too serious :) but I have come to the realisation that my hoarding habits are not as terrible as I've always been led to believe. For those of you who are now confused, "hoarding" refers to keeping loads of old junk that you don't actually need but are far too clingy and pathetic to part with. I am an absolute nightmare when it comes to these things; I still have notes that my friends wrote to me in Grade 6 (I may actually also have my grade 5 NS notes floating around somewhere at home...). Why? Because I convince myself that I might need it again someday. It's the You-Never-Know-Syndrome, and it's a bitch when you're trying to keep your room clean. My cupboard at home is filled to the brim with old stationery, files, notes, space-cases and other random crap that I just can't bring myself to throw away. Last holiday I finally got around to clearing away all my old soft toys, and instead of throwing them out or giving them away I put them in a plastic bag in the cupboard. Along with the plastic bag filled with stuff that my ex gave me, the files filled with my recorder music from Grade 5 and the box with random bits and pieces that I didn't want to toss out because hey, you never know.
By now you're probably thinking "Where is she going with this? How is this relevant to Rhodes and my life as a partying, drinking, falling-down-and-passing-out, occasionally studying student?" Well, today I found out that my hoarding skills can be a huge advantage when it comes to certain varsity-related problems. Example? Yesterday my law lecturer emailed us our tutorial exercise for today. With it was a list of two chapters that we were meant to read and a number of questions to answer about rights and legal subjectivity. Did I have the chapters? Nope. Would I have read them? Probably not. But as I flicked through the endless list of questions (OK there were only...hang on, let me count them...8 of them) I felt a growing panic. My tut starts at 16:05 today. It was about 13:45 when I first opened the file and had a good look at the exercise. Where was I going to find the information I needed??
The brighter cookies among you will be going "Well she's on her blog now...so she must have found a way to do her tut quickly and effortlessly!" Bingo. Some of the material that the questions covered seemed vaguely familiar, so I dug through the mass of crap that I've collected over the years and blew the dust off my file of law notes from first year. And right there among my messy handwriting and crumpled assignments I found a set of notes that had the information I needed. I answered the theory questions in under 20 minutes, all because I had had the foresight (or desperate, obsessive-compulsive need) not to throw out my old notes. Now I have finished my tut with plenty of time to spare! (Admittedly, I only did one of the application questions. But my lecturer will never know that!) And so, my dear Rhodents, by hoarding old and supposedly useless crap I have won myself an hour in which to take a quick and much-needed nap before my tut begins. Because I'm cool like that. Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz...
PS: As usual, apologies for not having posted in a long time. I'm running out of ideas regarding post material. Any suggestions are welcome! Hit me up on Facebook (those of you who know me) or leave me a comment on this post. :)
Showing posts with label students. Show all posts
Showing posts with label students. Show all posts
Tuesday, March 13, 2012
Monday, January 23, 2012
If I was a rich girl...
Ever wondered why guys always seem to have the money to buy endless computer games, gaming consoles and odd gadgets that they don't actually need? I believe I have the answer.
Firstly, guys earn more than girls. It's an accepted fact, even in the modern world. My own mother once commented that my brother's choice of career was more important than mine because one day he "will be the primary breadwinner of the family". Wtf? I'm not going to be entirely dependent on my husband for money! And what if I don't get married? I'll still have to provide for myself!
Ahem. Sorry. But other than the fact that guys earn more money, girls have less money because they spend more. And I'm sure all you guys are nodding your heads and going "Exactly!", but hear me out first. Girls don't spend more because they WANT to, but because they HAVE to. I'm not talking about buying handbags or endless pairs of shoes. I mean normal, everyday expenses that guys simply don't have. Conditioner, for example. How many straight guys actually use conditioner? Maybe a few, but not many. Body lotion is another one. And don't say "Girls don't need body lotion if guys don't!". It's fine for a guy to have rough, manly, I-work-all-day-in-the-fields skin, but would you really want a girlfriend with skin like that? No, I didn't think so. Hairbrushes are another one. Maybe it's just my social circle, but most of the guys I know never brush their hair.
Then there are monthly requirements like pads and tampons. Girls have to buy them, we have no choice. And those things are expensive! A box of tampons costs as much as a bottle of cheap wine. That's part of your predrinking money gone every month. Makeup is also insanely expensive - R80 for an eyeliner?? And guys, there's a difference between "the natural look" and no makeup.
Firstly, guys earn more than girls. It's an accepted fact, even in the modern world. My own mother once commented that my brother's choice of career was more important than mine because one day he "will be the primary breadwinner of the family". Wtf? I'm not going to be entirely dependent on my husband for money! And what if I don't get married? I'll still have to provide for myself!
Ahem. Sorry. But other than the fact that guys earn more money, girls have less money because they spend more. And I'm sure all you guys are nodding your heads and going "Exactly!", but hear me out first. Girls don't spend more because they WANT to, but because they HAVE to. I'm not talking about buying handbags or endless pairs of shoes. I mean normal, everyday expenses that guys simply don't have. Conditioner, for example. How many straight guys actually use conditioner? Maybe a few, but not many. Body lotion is another one. And don't say "Girls don't need body lotion if guys don't!". It's fine for a guy to have rough, manly, I-work-all-day-in-the-fields skin, but would you really want a girlfriend with skin like that? No, I didn't think so. Hairbrushes are another one. Maybe it's just my social circle, but most of the guys I know never brush their hair.
Then there are monthly requirements like pads and tampons. Girls have to buy them, we have no choice. And those things are expensive! A box of tampons costs as much as a bottle of cheap wine. That's part of your predrinking money gone every month. Makeup is also insanely expensive - R80 for an eyeliner?? And guys, there's a difference between "the natural look" and no makeup.
See??
When it comes down to it, maybe this is why guys are always expected to be the ones who pay for dinners out and buy presents for their girlfriends: because in the end, they usually have more money. So girls, the next time you see your boyfriend/guy friend playing the latest R700 XBox game, don't berate him for wasting his money. It's not like he has much else to spend it on :P
PS: Guys, please note that this is a tongue-in-cheek piece and not intended to offend anyone. In other words, it's a joke. Relax. :)
Friday, January 13, 2012
Oxbraaaaaai!
The Rhodes Big 5: five events that every Rhodes student has to attend at some point during their varsity career. These are:
1. Trivar
2. Oxbraai
3. Fish
4. Boatraces
5. ...I can never remember what the fifth one is. If anyone knows, please do enlighten me.
This holiday I finally managed to make arrangements to go to Oxbraai :D and it was certainly worth it. For the non-Rhodents and non-Eastern-Cape people among you, Oxbraai is essentially a massive braai that takes place in Bathurst in December every year. Students rock up, put up tents, drink way too much and just generally have an epic party. Thanks to my holiday job as an elf in a Christmas Grotto (don't ask...) I was able to fund my trip this year.
I arrived in Bathurst with my friend, K, and a group of his friends from East London. The queue of cars was scarily long but moved quickly, and before we knew it we were inside. After a couple of minutes of driving around aimlessly, we found a spot to park and set up our iconic red tent (it was iconic because the colour made it easy for us to find it again :P ). I was the only girl in a group of about four guys and so I mixed myself some Coke and vodka (om nom nom!) while they downed a few cold beers. Apparently, warm beer is the devil and they'd rather have no beer than drink it hot. To prevent such a disaster, we had about three cooler boxes filled with ice stacked in the back of the bakkie. In fact, there was barely enough room for the beer.
We found out pretty soon that the little sunshade attached to the tent was not going to be enough. As the area of shade shrank we moved closer and closer, until we were sitting with our knees touching and one guy was forced to move his chair into the actual tent. As the heat got worse we decided to take a stroll, drinks in hand. K, his friend S and I wandered among tents for a while, greeting people we knew and becoming steadily more sunburnt. Drink was flowing, there was a truck filled with foam nearby and someone was blaring music with heavy bass. It was fantastic.
During this walk I bumped into my boyfriend - who I was supposed to be sharing the back of a bakkie with (get your minds out of the gutter) - and spent most of the rest of the time with him. We also walked around for a while before stopping to chill with a friend of his. This friend had the right idea; he'd brought a gazebo, hubbly, camp chairs, a mattress AND even a couch. Yes, a proper couch that you would find in someone's living room. For a while we sat on the couch, smoking cherry-flavoured hubbly and trying not to fall asleep. After a bit more wandering we returned to doze on the mattress, half-listening to the conversations around us.
1. Trivar
2. Oxbraai
3. Fish
4. Boatraces
5. ...I can never remember what the fifth one is. If anyone knows, please do enlighten me.
This holiday I finally managed to make arrangements to go to Oxbraai :D and it was certainly worth it. For the non-Rhodents and non-Eastern-Cape people among you, Oxbraai is essentially a massive braai that takes place in Bathurst in December every year. Students rock up, put up tents, drink way too much and just generally have an epic party. Thanks to my holiday job as an elf in a Christmas Grotto (don't ask...) I was able to fund my trip this year.
I arrived in Bathurst with my friend, K, and a group of his friends from East London. The queue of cars was scarily long but moved quickly, and before we knew it we were inside. After a couple of minutes of driving around aimlessly, we found a spot to park and set up our iconic red tent (it was iconic because the colour made it easy for us to find it again :P ). I was the only girl in a group of about four guys and so I mixed myself some Coke and vodka (om nom nom!) while they downed a few cold beers. Apparently, warm beer is the devil and they'd rather have no beer than drink it hot. To prevent such a disaster, we had about three cooler boxes filled with ice stacked in the back of the bakkie. In fact, there was barely enough room for the beer.
We found out pretty soon that the little sunshade attached to the tent was not going to be enough. As the area of shade shrank we moved closer and closer, until we were sitting with our knees touching and one guy was forced to move his chair into the actual tent. As the heat got worse we decided to take a stroll, drinks in hand. K, his friend S and I wandered among tents for a while, greeting people we knew and becoming steadily more sunburnt. Drink was flowing, there was a truck filled with foam nearby and someone was blaring music with heavy bass. It was fantastic.
During this walk I bumped into my boyfriend - who I was supposed to be sharing the back of a bakkie with (get your minds out of the gutter) - and spent most of the rest of the time with him. We also walked around for a while before stopping to chill with a friend of his. This friend had the right idea; he'd brought a gazebo, hubbly, camp chairs, a mattress AND even a couch. Yes, a proper couch that you would find in someone's living room. For a while we sat on the couch, smoking cherry-flavoured hubbly and trying not to fall asleep. After a bit more wandering we returned to doze on the mattress, half-listening to the conversations around us.
The boyfriend and myself chilling on the mattress. Our photography skills are shocking, I know.
When it became dark we went to get our food, which consisted of a slice of bread, half a potato and WAY too many slices of ox meat (incidentally, an ox is a castrated bull. Am I the only person who didn't know that??). Having now eaten too much and drunk too much, we ran around a bit more generally making nuisances of ourselves. Actually, a lot of my night was spent staring absent-mindedly into space while my boyfriend found trees to pee against. If I could, I would have done the same; the Porta-Potties provided for the girls became increasingly disgusting as the night went on. We finally fell asleep around 3am and woke up at about 5:30 to the sounds of people moving around. Like most of the others, we left Bathurst by 6 and headed to Grahamstown for Wimpy breakfast, sleep and a much-needed shower.
While I didn't get quite as wasted as I'd thought I would, I still had an epic night. From chilling on the couch to eating plain bread rolls to getting slightly lost somewhere in the dark with the boyfriend, it was an awesome adventure. Would I go again? Definitely, but I'd do a few things differently. 1) I'd bring the Jammies girls with. 2) I'd bring a really big tent and shade cloth. 3) I'd bring a LOT more alcohol.
So...who's keen to make next Oxbraai even bigger? :D
Saturday, December 10, 2011
Summer lovin' had me a blast
"Summer fling, don't mean a thing. But oh-oh-oh, oh those summer nights..."
- Grease
I wasn't planning on blogging during the vac, but since the idea for a post hit me I figured why the hell not? This may not be strictly Rhodent-oriented, but how many of my posts actually are? :P
As the title suggests, I've been thinking about summer romance. No, I'm not having a torrid holiday affair - I'm a happily taken woman :) - but something in the humid December air always makes me think of flirty holiday flings. Come on, admit it: even if you're a happy spinster (is there such a thing?), you've considered breaking your vow of singledom during the summer vac. There's nothing quite like sending cheeky smses to the new hottie in your life, or lounging together over sundowners on the pier, or taking a late-night swim under the stars (or a skinny-dip. Either way ;) ). Summer adds a flavour of magic to any budding romance.
In summer 2009 I was in a long-term and long-distance relationship. My memories of that time involve early morning treks on the beach to watch the sunrise, hot afternoons watching movies and drinking Coke, and nights driving around the small beach town in a beach buggy with the warm salt breeze blowing back my hair. I had finally finished school; I was young, free, and ready to take on the world with my first love at my side. Those eight weeks were a golden summer that I will never forget.
Summer 2010 was somewhat different, as I was single over Christmas for the first time in four years. This time my holiday involved what turned out to be a true summer fling. We flirted all through the exam period, hooked up on the last night of term and spent many nights over the vac chatting on mXit and Gtalk. At New Year we finally saw each other, and of course we hooked up again (in a rather drunken state. Now that I think about it, we only ever hooked up drunk. Hmm). The flirting continued until O-week, when we hooked up again. I'm still not entirely sure what happened after that, but we stopped talking as much and our little romance seemed to dwindle away into nothing. It was probably the closest I've ever come to a real summer fling.
I'm not advocating promiscuity or flinging yourself at the nearest cute face. But take advantage of the delightfully warm weather and find someone sexy to share cocktails and a few naughty giggles with. Throw a smile over your shoulder at the cutie on the dancefloor. Chat up the bartender. Ask a hot tourist to join in a game of beach cricket. Summer is made for flirting; don't waste it! Rock your skimpy bikini, your wifebeaters, your glittery little dresses and open-necked shirts. As for me...if all goes according to plan, summer 2011 will involve Oxbraai, alcohol, and cheeky flirting with my sexy Rhodes boy. Which may not be a summer fling, but is just as good. If not better. ;)
- Grease
I wasn't planning on blogging during the vac, but since the idea for a post hit me I figured why the hell not? This may not be strictly Rhodent-oriented, but how many of my posts actually are? :P
As the title suggests, I've been thinking about summer romance. No, I'm not having a torrid holiday affair - I'm a happily taken woman :) - but something in the humid December air always makes me think of flirty holiday flings. Come on, admit it: even if you're a happy spinster (is there such a thing?), you've considered breaking your vow of singledom during the summer vac. There's nothing quite like sending cheeky smses to the new hottie in your life, or lounging together over sundowners on the pier, or taking a late-night swim under the stars (or a skinny-dip. Either way ;) ). Summer adds a flavour of magic to any budding romance.
In summer 2009 I was in a long-term and long-distance relationship. My memories of that time involve early morning treks on the beach to watch the sunrise, hot afternoons watching movies and drinking Coke, and nights driving around the small beach town in a beach buggy with the warm salt breeze blowing back my hair. I had finally finished school; I was young, free, and ready to take on the world with my first love at my side. Those eight weeks were a golden summer that I will never forget.
Summer 2010 was somewhat different, as I was single over Christmas for the first time in four years. This time my holiday involved what turned out to be a true summer fling. We flirted all through the exam period, hooked up on the last night of term and spent many nights over the vac chatting on mXit and Gtalk. At New Year we finally saw each other, and of course we hooked up again (in a rather drunken state. Now that I think about it, we only ever hooked up drunk. Hmm). The flirting continued until O-week, when we hooked up again. I'm still not entirely sure what happened after that, but we stopped talking as much and our little romance seemed to dwindle away into nothing. It was probably the closest I've ever come to a real summer fling.
I'm not advocating promiscuity or flinging yourself at the nearest cute face. But take advantage of the delightfully warm weather and find someone sexy to share cocktails and a few naughty giggles with. Throw a smile over your shoulder at the cutie on the dancefloor. Chat up the bartender. Ask a hot tourist to join in a game of beach cricket. Summer is made for flirting; don't waste it! Rock your skimpy bikini, your wifebeaters, your glittery little dresses and open-necked shirts. As for me...if all goes according to plan, summer 2011 will involve Oxbraai, alcohol, and cheeky flirting with my sexy Rhodes boy. Which may not be a summer fling, but is just as good. If not better. ;)
Sunday, November 20, 2011
Exam song: Procrastinating
As is tradition, here is my latest exam song for the second semester of 2012. The chorus of this popped into my head while I was studying for Latin in the library last night. It's based on "Unfaithful" by Rhianna. Hope you like it :) If you want, check out my other two earlier songs: "Can you feel the stress tonight?" (which is not particulary good) and "Library Girl" (my personal favourite).
Story of my life
Searching for a first
But it keeps avoiding me
Sorrow in my soul
'Cause it seems that low
Marks are all I'll ever see
It's more than exams
And this is more than tough
The reason that I'm feeling blue
I should be partying
Instead I'm staying in
To study all my notes with you
And I know that I am procrastinating
It kills me inside
To know that I should be working all through the night
I feel like dying
Chorus:
I don't wanna do this anymore
I don't even know the reason why
But every time I walk through that door
I know I die a little more inside
I don't wanna study anymore
I don't wanna waste away my night
I just wanna leave the library
I feel it in the air
As I chew my hair
Knowing I'll be working late
Boys at the next table
Ask if I am able
To help them with their study date
I don't want to help
I say I have to work
A lie I didn't have to tell
Because we all know
I can't help guys that slow
And we know it very well
And I know that I am procrastinating
It kills me inside
To know that I should be working all through the night
I feel like dying
(Chorus)
My work, my marks
I might as well take a gun and put it to my head
Get it over with
I don't wanna do this anymore...
(Chorus)
Story of my life
Searching for a first
But it keeps avoiding me
Sorrow in my soul
'Cause it seems that low
Marks are all I'll ever see
It's more than exams
And this is more than tough
The reason that I'm feeling blue
I should be partying
Instead I'm staying in
To study all my notes with you
And I know that I am procrastinating
It kills me inside
To know that I should be working all through the night
I feel like dying
Chorus:
I don't wanna do this anymore
I don't even know the reason why
But every time I walk through that door
I know I die a little more inside
I don't wanna study anymore
I don't wanna waste away my night
I just wanna leave the library
I feel it in the air
As I chew my hair
Knowing I'll be working late
Boys at the next table
Ask if I am able
To help them with their study date
I don't want to help
I say I have to work
A lie I didn't have to tell
Because we all know
I can't help guys that slow
And we know it very well
And I know that I am procrastinating
It kills me inside
To know that I should be working all through the night
I feel like dying
(Chorus)
My work, my marks
I might as well take a gun and put it to my head
Get it over with
I don't wanna do this anymore...
(Chorus)
Sunday, November 13, 2011
For the Rhodents' social life never dies!
Is it sad that I'm actually pleased to have finally begun exams? For the past two weeks I've had no lectures, which sounds heavenly until you realise that I've spent that time confined to the library with my nose buried in notes (mostly law). To actually walk into the Great Hall today and WRITE something felt fantastic :D even though I'm pretty sure I got question 4 wrong (if any Phil 2 students can help me out here, it'll be much appreciated!)
It's always interesting to see that, unlike most places, the social life of the Rhodents doesn't die during exams. Instead it simply shifts from Friars to the library; from Rat to the Jac Labs. It sounds ridiculous, but the library and the Kaif have become the social hub of Rhodes in the past two weeks. I see a familiar face almost every time I step through that awesome revolving door (nerdy quote for the day: "Whoever said anything was possible never tried to slam a revolving door") and Kaif breaks lead to conversations with people I haven't seen in ages (Hi Kelvin!). I even find myself making new friends; I had a brief discussion with a girl when I asked her to watch my bag while I went to the bathroom, and some random guy came up and asked me for help when he saw that I was reading Philosophy notes. Groups of smokers form on the steps outside the library, chattering and comparing notes while non-smokers chill at the Kaif tables with a cup of coffee or a Fizz pop. And of course there's always the entertainment that arises when a gust of wind sends someone's notes scattered across the Kaif quad.
Speaking of the Kaif, allow me to deviate slightly from my topic to comment on how weird their menu is. Hot chips...awesome. Hot chips with cheese...unusual, but cool. Hot chips with cheese and polony...wtf? Who puts polony in chips? And how? Do they cut it into tiny squares and scatter it in the bag? Or do you just get a couple of slices along with your order? I swear I'm going to order it one day out of sheer curiosity.
The Kaif is actually quite a danger zone during exams. As one friend so eloquently put it: "You'll be studying in the library and decide to take a 10 minute break at the Kaif. Three hours and R50 later, you're STILL there." I've had first-hand experience of this: half hour breaks become one-and-a-half hour breaks, one Coke becomes one Coke and a donut and and and...in the end, the Kaif doesn't make you relax. It makes you broke. And fat. And feel guilty for not studying. But you know what? I'd rather spend all morning and all my money at the Kaif than spend another ten seconds studying the property rights of African customary law. And I'd be pretty bleak if it suddenly shut down. I mean, where could I legitimately procrastinate?
PS: shout out to all the poor law students. Regardless of what year you're in, law exams SUCK.
It's always interesting to see that, unlike most places, the social life of the Rhodents doesn't die during exams. Instead it simply shifts from Friars to the library; from Rat to the Jac Labs. It sounds ridiculous, but the library and the Kaif have become the social hub of Rhodes in the past two weeks. I see a familiar face almost every time I step through that awesome revolving door (nerdy quote for the day: "Whoever said anything was possible never tried to slam a revolving door") and Kaif breaks lead to conversations with people I haven't seen in ages (Hi Kelvin!). I even find myself making new friends; I had a brief discussion with a girl when I asked her to watch my bag while I went to the bathroom, and some random guy came up and asked me for help when he saw that I was reading Philosophy notes. Groups of smokers form on the steps outside the library, chattering and comparing notes while non-smokers chill at the Kaif tables with a cup of coffee or a Fizz pop. And of course there's always the entertainment that arises when a gust of wind sends someone's notes scattered across the Kaif quad.
Speaking of the Kaif, allow me to deviate slightly from my topic to comment on how weird their menu is. Hot chips...awesome. Hot chips with cheese...unusual, but cool. Hot chips with cheese and polony...wtf? Who puts polony in chips? And how? Do they cut it into tiny squares and scatter it in the bag? Or do you just get a couple of slices along with your order? I swear I'm going to order it one day out of sheer curiosity.
^ that's the Kaif. (I'm putting more photos in to make the blog prettier :P ) The slightly ridiculous-looking randoms are in the middle of a flash mob.
The Kaif is actually quite a danger zone during exams. As one friend so eloquently put it: "You'll be studying in the library and decide to take a 10 minute break at the Kaif. Three hours and R50 later, you're STILL there." I've had first-hand experience of this: half hour breaks become one-and-a-half hour breaks, one Coke becomes one Coke and a donut and and and...in the end, the Kaif doesn't make you relax. It makes you broke. And fat. And feel guilty for not studying. But you know what? I'd rather spend all morning and all my money at the Kaif than spend another ten seconds studying the property rights of African customary law. And I'd be pretty bleak if it suddenly shut down. I mean, where could I legitimately procrastinate?
PS: shout out to all the poor law students. Regardless of what year you're in, law exams SUCK.
Saturday, November 12, 2011
Toastiness :)
On that note, I'm writing my first exam - Philosophy - this afternoon. Wish me luck! Expect a post about exam stress sometime in the near future :P
Sunday, October 30, 2011
You drive a WHAT?!
Student cars - you can't miss them. First you hear the rattling and backfiring...then you see the rust patches and the missing doorhandles...and then it jerks to a stop in front of you, and promptly falls apart like something out of a cartoon. How I wish I was exaggerating...
In the two years that I've been here, I've been on one or two roadtrips in student cars. The first one was a brief trip to Port Alfred for a weekend, and although the weekend itself was amazing, the car we travelled in was a sight to behold. During one trip the owner of the car and his friend were sitting in the front seat while we took the back seat. I remember the conversation going something like this...
Friend: Shit.
Owner: What?
Friend: Dude, something just fell out from under the dashboard. (holds up random black thing). What is this?
Owner: Dunno.
Friend: D'you think it's important?
Owner: God I hope not. Put it back.
Whatever it was (everyone knows I am not good with cars...) it must've been important because we broke down ten minutes later. We ended up sitting on the side of the road for half an hour until a good Samaritan offered to tow us to the nearest 'garage', which turned out to be a coffee shop in the middle of nowhere. Another hour passed before a friend from Grahamstown finally arrived to pick us up. On the bright side, one of the guys did take off his shirt and thus provided something interesting for us to look at while we waited ;)
Later in the year we headed down to PE for Trivar. After some wild partying, we were driving back to the flat we were staying at when the car's clutch burnt out. And there we were, only one of the five of us sober (the driver), stuck at a traffic light in the middle of a city that we didn't know, at 2 o' clock in the morning. A police car stopped briefly to find out what was going on, 'helpfully' offered to give us the number for a towing place, then left us alone again. Drunk and tired, we decided to push the car 1km home.
We had barely been pushing for 200m when a second car pulled up behind us. You see, what with us being Rhodents and it being Trivar, we were all wearing our white, purple-painted overalls. The car which stopped turned out to be full of Rhodents as well, all heading home from their Trivar celebrations. When they recognised our overalls they decided to stop and help. What could have been a disaster became quite festive as we took it in turns to push the car, chatting and taking photos and generally being drunkenly friendly. To this day I have no idea who they were.
These are just two of many, many stories that I could share about my experiences with student cars. I've come to realise that there are several factors you can look out for if you want to tell whether a car has a student owner or not. These include:
In the two years that I've been here, I've been on one or two roadtrips in student cars. The first one was a brief trip to Port Alfred for a weekend, and although the weekend itself was amazing, the car we travelled in was a sight to behold. During one trip the owner of the car and his friend were sitting in the front seat while we took the back seat. I remember the conversation going something like this...
Friend: Shit.
Owner: What?
Friend: Dude, something just fell out from under the dashboard. (holds up random black thing). What is this?
Owner: Dunno.
Friend: D'you think it's important?
Owner: God I hope not. Put it back.
Whatever it was (everyone knows I am not good with cars...) it must've been important because we broke down ten minutes later. We ended up sitting on the side of the road for half an hour until a good Samaritan offered to tow us to the nearest 'garage', which turned out to be a coffee shop in the middle of nowhere. Another hour passed before a friend from Grahamstown finally arrived to pick us up. On the bright side, one of the guys did take off his shirt and thus provided something interesting for us to look at while we waited ;)
Later in the year we headed down to PE for Trivar. After some wild partying, we were driving back to the flat we were staying at when the car's clutch burnt out. And there we were, only one of the five of us sober (the driver), stuck at a traffic light in the middle of a city that we didn't know, at 2 o' clock in the morning. A police car stopped briefly to find out what was going on, 'helpfully' offered to give us the number for a towing place, then left us alone again. Drunk and tired, we decided to push the car 1km home.
We had barely been pushing for 200m when a second car pulled up behind us. You see, what with us being Rhodents and it being Trivar, we were all wearing our white, purple-painted overalls. The car which stopped turned out to be full of Rhodents as well, all heading home from their Trivar celebrations. When they recognised our overalls they decided to stop and help. What could have been a disaster became quite festive as we took it in turns to push the car, chatting and taking photos and generally being drunkenly friendly. To this day I have no idea who they were.
These are just two of many, many stories that I could share about my experiences with student cars. I've come to realise that there are several factors you can look out for if you want to tell whether a car has a student owner or not. These include:
- Does it make strange rattling or squealing sounds when being driven?
- Does it slide slowly to a halt when the brakes are applied?
- Do pieces fall off when it is parked?
- Is the bumper held on with string? (alternatively: is the aerial held on with duct tape?)
- Does it take ten minutes to start?
Thursday, October 20, 2011
What's in a name?
When I was in primary school, my nickname was "Dictionary". Why? Because I was good at spelling and other kids would ask me how to spell things for their essays and such. I was later upgraded to "Spell Check" by the guy I sat next to, because he decided that my nickname wasn't modern enough. Since then I've gravitated through several other nicknames, but it wasn't until I hit Rhodes that I realised how common nicknames are. Especially among guys.
In my first Philosophy tut of first year, a friend and I discovered that there were several very good-looking boys in our group. We didn't know their names, so we decided to give them nicknames. Mostly so that we could perv over them together. Some of them were very boring; one guy was nicknamed Blondie because he was, well, blond. Duh. Another was the gentle giant, because he was 6"4 and talked about emotions a lot. The one I was crushing on was nicknamed the sexy loudmouth, because he was drop-dead gorgeous and talked way too much. The one my friend was crushing on was God's gift to women (which I'd assume is self-explanatory). Of course these guys never knew their nicknames (and if you're reading this and figure out which one you are, I applaud you :P ).
I think I've always been in the habit of nicknaming guy friends, but some nicknames stuck more than others. My two closest guys from school were alpha geek and the cupcake. Alpha geek came from a definition we once found in a magazine, as "the person who knows more on a subject than anyone else in the room". The cupcake was my GBF (gay best friend) who wanted to write a cookery book and use the pseudonym The Cupcake Queen. This habit extended into varsity - my friends have been nicknamed with terms as diverse as Creep (because he gets creepy when he's drunk) and Neanderthal (I just spent fifteen minutes rereading old gtalk conversations to remember where that one came from - apparently because he couldn't multitask).
Since coming to Rhodes, I've discovered that guys have some strange nicknames. I've been introduced to ones as diverse as Mouse, Mad Cow, Hedgehog, Krusty, O Snap, Frenchie and Ralph (which, incidentally, did not come from a vomiting habit as one would think; it had something to do with the character Ralph from Lord of the Flies). Sadly I can't explain where all of these nicknames come from; some are from surnames, some are from physical appearance, some are from drunken incidents, nationality or a habit of using a particular saying. Sometimes I find it's safer not to ask.
Girls with nicknames don't seem to be quite as common somehow. Shortened versions of names occur; for example, a lot of friends call me Tay or Tails instead of Tayla (although Tails goes way back to when I was much, much younger. My sister and I used to watch Sonic the Hedgehog. Because she was older, she got to be Sonic. And I got to be the sidekick named - yes, you guessed it - Tails). Francesca is known as Fran, Danelle is Dan, Melinda is Mel and Lwambeso (I hope I spelled that right) is Lulu. Now that I think about it, maybe girls are just a lot less original when it comes to nicknames. Come on, ladies! We need to get creative. We've already had one step in the right direction with one friend, who recently decided to nickname me Sensei (for reasons that will remain undisclosed...). It's not like we don't have enough embarassing drunken moments to provide for potential nicknames! (Well, I'm speaking for the Jammies girls here - I don't know about the rest of you :P ).
...actually, on second thoughts, let's scrap that idea. Certain embarassing moments should stay as secretive as possible. I can live with 'Sensei'. :P
PS: brief shout out to the phil boys. You're still as good looking as you were last year :)
In my first Philosophy tut of first year, a friend and I discovered that there were several very good-looking boys in our group. We didn't know their names, so we decided to give them nicknames. Mostly so that we could perv over them together. Some of them were very boring; one guy was nicknamed Blondie because he was, well, blond. Duh. Another was the gentle giant, because he was 6"4 and talked about emotions a lot. The one I was crushing on was nicknamed the sexy loudmouth, because he was drop-dead gorgeous and talked way too much. The one my friend was crushing on was God's gift to women (which I'd assume is self-explanatory). Of course these guys never knew their nicknames (and if you're reading this and figure out which one you are, I applaud you :P ).
I think I've always been in the habit of nicknaming guy friends, but some nicknames stuck more than others. My two closest guys from school were alpha geek and the cupcake. Alpha geek came from a definition we once found in a magazine, as "the person who knows more on a subject than anyone else in the room". The cupcake was my GBF (gay best friend) who wanted to write a cookery book and use the pseudonym The Cupcake Queen. This habit extended into varsity - my friends have been nicknamed with terms as diverse as Creep (because he gets creepy when he's drunk) and Neanderthal (I just spent fifteen minutes rereading old gtalk conversations to remember where that one came from - apparently because he couldn't multitask).
Since coming to Rhodes, I've discovered that guys have some strange nicknames. I've been introduced to ones as diverse as Mouse, Mad Cow, Hedgehog, Krusty, O Snap, Frenchie and Ralph (which, incidentally, did not come from a vomiting habit as one would think; it had something to do with the character Ralph from Lord of the Flies). Sadly I can't explain where all of these nicknames come from; some are from surnames, some are from physical appearance, some are from drunken incidents, nationality or a habit of using a particular saying. Sometimes I find it's safer not to ask.
Girls with nicknames don't seem to be quite as common somehow. Shortened versions of names occur; for example, a lot of friends call me Tay or Tails instead of Tayla (although Tails goes way back to when I was much, much younger. My sister and I used to watch Sonic the Hedgehog. Because she was older, she got to be Sonic. And I got to be the sidekick named - yes, you guessed it - Tails). Francesca is known as Fran, Danelle is Dan, Melinda is Mel and Lwambeso (I hope I spelled that right) is Lulu. Now that I think about it, maybe girls are just a lot less original when it comes to nicknames. Come on, ladies! We need to get creative. We've already had one step in the right direction with one friend, who recently decided to nickname me Sensei (for reasons that will remain undisclosed...). It's not like we don't have enough embarassing drunken moments to provide for potential nicknames! (Well, I'm speaking for the Jammies girls here - I don't know about the rest of you :P ).
...actually, on second thoughts, let's scrap that idea. Certain embarassing moments should stay as secretive as possible. I can live with 'Sensei'. :P
PS: brief shout out to the phil boys. You're still as good looking as you were last year :)
Tuesday, August 2, 2011
The stickiest of spiderwebs
First off, I apologise for my extended absence. I was on holiday for six weeks :D and naturally it's taking me a while to get back into the swing of things in the new semester. Also, I had no idea what to write about. But as always, my friends have (unwittingly) provided me with much-needed material for a new post.
Ever heard of the term "gobweb"? Yes, it is one of the grossest-sounding terms I have ever come across in my life. It makes me think of stringy saliva...ewwwie. And yet, unfortunately, it seems that 90% of the Rhodes students - in fact, most students all over the world - are involved in a gobweb of sorts. It just becomes more prevalent here because Grahamstown is such a tiny little place.
For those of you who are now confused, imagine a gobweb to be rather like a spider diagram or mindmap, where people are linked via hookups. For example, say I hooked up with Bob. Then Bob hooked up with Julie. On the gobweb, I am indirectly linked to Julie. Gettit? It's not a complicated concept.
On Sunday night my friends and I were chilling in one friend's room, drinking tea and chatting. The concept of the gobweb came up, and we slowly realised that we were all connected by at least one removal. For example, Julie and Sue are my friends. I hooked up with Bob, Bob hooked up with Julie, Julie hooked up with Fred, Fred hooked up with Sue.
...
OK it looks way better if you actually draw the diagram. It's a rather disturbing concept. In fact, it seems to be almost impossible to find someone in Grahamstown who hasn't:
a) Hooked up with one of your friends
b) Been friends with one of your friends
c) Been hit on by one of your friends.
At first I thought that hey, maybe my friends are just liberal like that :P (you guys know I'm joking...) But then last night I met a girl for the first time and we started chatting. Surprise, surprise...we've both hooked up with the same guy at some point in the past. Myself and a complete stranger not only hooked up with the same guy, but (judging from our conversation about boys we know at Rhodes in general) have almost exactly the same taste in guys. That's downright creepy. Especially when you consider how dirty and bacteria-ridden the human mouth is. To put it crudely, hooking up with the same guy/girl as your friend implies that you've both had your tongue in the same mouth. Disturbing image? My point exactly.
What is the point of this post? Mostly to really, really creep people out :D seriously though, it's no wonder that colds, flu and stomach bugs travel so quickly around the students here. Hooking up with random people is bad (Yes, I am the ultimate hypocrite. Don't judge me :P ) and it is on this basis that I applaud one particular friend of mine, who has not had a single random hookup in the almost-two years that she's been here. Not for lack of opportunity, mind - she even had one hot boy taking his shirt off on the dancefloor to impress her (or so I've heard). But, as she said last night, "Drunk or sober, I have standards."
Words to live by.
Ever heard of the term "gobweb"? Yes, it is one of the grossest-sounding terms I have ever come across in my life. It makes me think of stringy saliva...ewwwie. And yet, unfortunately, it seems that 90% of the Rhodes students - in fact, most students all over the world - are involved in a gobweb of sorts. It just becomes more prevalent here because Grahamstown is such a tiny little place.
For those of you who are now confused, imagine a gobweb to be rather like a spider diagram or mindmap, where people are linked via hookups. For example, say I hooked up with Bob. Then Bob hooked up with Julie. On the gobweb, I am indirectly linked to Julie. Gettit? It's not a complicated concept.
On Sunday night my friends and I were chilling in one friend's room, drinking tea and chatting. The concept of the gobweb came up, and we slowly realised that we were all connected by at least one removal. For example, Julie and Sue are my friends. I hooked up with Bob, Bob hooked up with Julie, Julie hooked up with Fred, Fred hooked up with Sue.
...
OK it looks way better if you actually draw the diagram. It's a rather disturbing concept. In fact, it seems to be almost impossible to find someone in Grahamstown who hasn't:
a) Hooked up with one of your friends
b) Been friends with one of your friends
c) Been hit on by one of your friends.
At first I thought that hey, maybe my friends are just liberal like that :P (you guys know I'm joking...) But then last night I met a girl for the first time and we started chatting. Surprise, surprise...we've both hooked up with the same guy at some point in the past. Myself and a complete stranger not only hooked up with the same guy, but (judging from our conversation about boys we know at Rhodes in general) have almost exactly the same taste in guys. That's downright creepy. Especially when you consider how dirty and bacteria-ridden the human mouth is. To put it crudely, hooking up with the same guy/girl as your friend implies that you've both had your tongue in the same mouth. Disturbing image? My point exactly.
What is the point of this post? Mostly to really, really creep people out :D seriously though, it's no wonder that colds, flu and stomach bugs travel so quickly around the students here. Hooking up with random people is bad (Yes, I am the ultimate hypocrite. Don't judge me :P ) and it is on this basis that I applaud one particular friend of mine, who has not had a single random hookup in the almost-two years that she's been here. Not for lack of opportunity, mind - she even had one hot boy taking his shirt off on the dancefloor to impress her (or so I've heard). But, as she said last night, "Drunk or sober, I have standards."
Words to live by.
Wednesday, June 8, 2011
Ah l'amore
As you may have guessed from the title, I am currently studying (well, avoiding studying) for my French exam. However, after what may have been a slight misunderstanding recently, I thought it would be fun to define the different levels of love/romantic interest. As I see them, anyway. Please note that these range from least amount of romantic interest (1) to highest amount of romantic interest (5).
Level 1 - The Eye Candy
This is probably someone you've never spoken to. But when you walk into class and see him lounging in his seat, wearing a charming grin as he flirts with the swooning girl behind him, you have to actively concentrate on not openly drooling. It also takes great mental effort not to stare at his beautiful eyes all through class, or get distracted when he turns around to talk to someone. However, your interest in this guy does not extend beyond imagining what you would do if you were locked in a closet with him i.e. you do not want a relationship. You just want him.
Level 2 - The guy you "like"
One step up from the Eye Candy, this guy you have actually had conversations with. Maybe you've drunkenly hooked up or a friend has introduced you. However you may have met, you find this guy to be interesting, cute and a potential great friend. Would you date him? Meh, maybe if you had no other options. This emotions may, over time, develop into Level 3 feelings but it may also simply fade before you see him again. Only time can tell.
Level 3 - The Crush
Perhaps you've developed feelings for a close friend, or maybe you really click with the guy in your Latin class (cough). You find yourself thinking about him a lot and wanting to spend time with him. You strike up conversations at every opportunity; you sms him when you find a funny picture or joke that you know he'll like; you look forward to going to lectures/the library/the Kaif just because you know that you might see him there. You imagine what it would be like to be in a relationship with him. Often, you may avoid him on your nights out because a) you don't want him to be just a once-off hookup and b) NO-ONE looks their best while drunk. No matter how pretty you may have been when the night began.
Level 4 - Relationship-in-waiting
You hook up. You spend every waking moment together. He sends you cute smses and you hold hands while cuddling and watching movies. What's the problem? "It's not Facebook official." Come on, we're all adults here. If you've talked about taking it slow then hey, that's fine. At least you've discussed where your relationship is going. But if you're being the nauseatingly cute couple while insisting that you're not actually 'a couple', please get over it. We all know that you're together. Stop trying to fool yourself.
Level 5 - Boyfriend/Girlfriend
So it's finally on Facebook and you're officially referring to each other as your boyfriend/girlfriend/soul mate. I'm happy for you :). There's not much to say about this one as it seems fairly self-explanatory. But if you've only been dating for two weeks, maybe hold off on the wedding talk. He'll still be marvelling at the fact that a girl is actually willing to hook up with him on a regular basis; he doesn't want to start picking china patterns and naming your kids just yet.
I would just like to point out that random hookups, unrequited admirers and "fun-buddies" (see, Caroline? I'm using your terms :P ) have not been added to this list. Why? Um, because they're not worth romantic interest, that's why. Don't feel the need to push yourself into a relationship with the guy just because he's into you or you had one drunken hookup. And if you're the type of person who can handle casual sex, then keep your fun-buddy that way. Romance tends to complicate things; don't start imagining feelings where none are present. Trust me, I have been down that road before and it only leads to broken hearts (his, not yours). Have your fun, but remember...play nice.
Level 1 - The Eye Candy
This is probably someone you've never spoken to. But when you walk into class and see him lounging in his seat, wearing a charming grin as he flirts with the swooning girl behind him, you have to actively concentrate on not openly drooling. It also takes great mental effort not to stare at his beautiful eyes all through class, or get distracted when he turns around to talk to someone. However, your interest in this guy does not extend beyond imagining what you would do if you were locked in a closet with him i.e. you do not want a relationship. You just want him.
Level 2 - The guy you "like"
One step up from the Eye Candy, this guy you have actually had conversations with. Maybe you've drunkenly hooked up or a friend has introduced you. However you may have met, you find this guy to be interesting, cute and a potential great friend. Would you date him? Meh, maybe if you had no other options. This emotions may, over time, develop into Level 3 feelings but it may also simply fade before you see him again. Only time can tell.
Level 3 - The Crush
Perhaps you've developed feelings for a close friend, or maybe you really click with the guy in your Latin class (cough). You find yourself thinking about him a lot and wanting to spend time with him. You strike up conversations at every opportunity; you sms him when you find a funny picture or joke that you know he'll like; you look forward to going to lectures/the library/the Kaif just because you know that you might see him there. You imagine what it would be like to be in a relationship with him. Often, you may avoid him on your nights out because a) you don't want him to be just a once-off hookup and b) NO-ONE looks their best while drunk. No matter how pretty you may have been when the night began.
Level 4 - Relationship-in-waiting
You hook up. You spend every waking moment together. He sends you cute smses and you hold hands while cuddling and watching movies. What's the problem? "It's not Facebook official." Come on, we're all adults here. If you've talked about taking it slow then hey, that's fine. At least you've discussed where your relationship is going. But if you're being the nauseatingly cute couple while insisting that you're not actually 'a couple', please get over it. We all know that you're together. Stop trying to fool yourself.
Level 5 - Boyfriend/Girlfriend
So it's finally on Facebook and you're officially referring to each other as your boyfriend/girlfriend/soul mate. I'm happy for you :). There's not much to say about this one as it seems fairly self-explanatory. But if you've only been dating for two weeks, maybe hold off on the wedding talk. He'll still be marvelling at the fact that a girl is actually willing to hook up with him on a regular basis; he doesn't want to start picking china patterns and naming your kids just yet.
I would just like to point out that random hookups, unrequited admirers and "fun-buddies" (see, Caroline? I'm using your terms :P ) have not been added to this list. Why? Um, because they're not worth romantic interest, that's why. Don't feel the need to push yourself into a relationship with the guy just because he's into you or you had one drunken hookup. And if you're the type of person who can handle casual sex, then keep your fun-buddy that way. Romance tends to complicate things; don't start imagining feelings where none are present. Trust me, I have been down that road before and it only leads to broken hearts (his, not yours). Have your fun, but remember...play nice.
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