It was THIS big!

"I prefer German sausages to viennas. Quality over quantity!"
"That's right, bite it!"
"It was too big to swallow. Then it got stuck in my throat and it tasted really bad."
"You learn to swallow them more easily with time."

Yes, those sound exceptionally dodgy. Are they lines in a bad Mills and Boon novel? Nope, they're conversations that came up in the dining hall, and they're all entirely innocent. We really were talking about sausages. One friend was biting a banana. Another friend was complaining about how antibiotic tablets are too big and hard to swallow. And yet somehow, these conversations became THAT much more entertaining when we started adding dodgy innuendos to them.

When I was in highschool I had a friend who insisted that "anything can sound sexual if you say it in the right voice". Apparently that's especially true in the dining hall. One would think that a girls' dining hall would be more subdued than a mixed or all-boys hall, but I've discovered that this is not so. Jokes about the "moistness" of malva pudding, big bananas, learning to swallow properly in case you choke, sausages that squirt cheese when you bite them, and so on, have unfortunately (or possibly fortunately) become usual topics of conversation at lunch and supper. And they usually start out entirely innocently! Yesterday was particularly hilarious, when the above antibiotic scenario came up. It went something like this:

Friend 1: "I hate taking antibiotics."
Friend 2: "Why?"
Friend 1: "They're too big! I can't swallow properly. Yesterday I tried and it got stuck in my throat. And it tasted really bad!"
(cue friend 2 casting a sideways glance at me and both of us cracking up)
Friend 1: "What? It's true!"

The funny part? It went straight over her head, and thus took her ages to actually realise why we were laughing (she was only forgiven for it because she's a first year). And now I have to ask myself the question: do I have exceptionally dirty-minded friends? Are ALL girls that bad? Or - and this is the part that scares me - am I the one who made them that way? :P